It can be quite difficult as a family law professional watching a film or TV programme where family law matters are involved. Over the years, much time has been spent with colleagues at the coffee machine discussing inaccurate and wrongly portrayed legal points in film and TV.

I have particularly felt this frustration since being a mediator. Mediation is often shown as a therapeutic or counselling option, which it is not. This portrayal distorts perception of mediation and reduces the chance of it being considered as an option to resolve issues.

It was therefore with trepidation that I started watching “Playing Nice” this week, an ITV drama (which I am only halfway through at the moment!) Without meaning to give away any spoilers, during the court process mediation was attempted. The mediator asked questions and the parents for their opinions and views. However, the point at which I got my hackles up was when the mediator said “That is a good proposal”. I do wish the researchers had spoken to mediator before filming the scene, as they would’ve been told clearly that a mediator cannot ever give their own view or judgement on proposals or solutions suggested.

The purpose of a mediator is to be neutral and impartial. Mediators can give legal information, facilitate conversations and explain options. The mediator is not there as any form of adjudicator, arbitrator or judge and does not give their own opinions. In doing so they lose their impartiality and neutrality which is key in providing a safe neutral environment for the discussions to happen. Mediation is also protected by “without prejudice” protection which means that the discussions had a mediation cannot be referred to in front of a judge. This is where the process enables people to explore options without fear of saying or doing the wrong thing.

I have yet to watch the rest of the series, and do hope that the legal process that follows is portrayed in a fair way. One positive was a comment made by the lawyer in the drama which was that mediation could help the parents keep things out of court, but she then went on to say that if mediation failed court would likely mean things would get unpleasant.  

If you would like to know how mediation can assist you send us an email at hello@familymandm.co.uk or give us a ring on 0800 206 2258 

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